There are hundred of traps which you can encounter on your way to real victory. Some of them are constant topic of discussions on the fora or in many articles, for which you often have to pay. The multitude of options brings one, very important question: “Where to start from? ”

1. Think of the obstacles which have stopped you from pursuing your last goal. Let’s say that you have noticed a lump on your right breast. You are stressed, busy with your work and also have problems with your partner, who started to be abusive.

You might need medical advice more because of nervousness, forgetting about the other symptoms. What postpones you from seeing the doctor right now? Make a list and think what is the biggest obstacle to handle with.

2. What did you do to avoid taking action? have you got any favourite activities, protecting you from facing the truth? One more bar of chocolate, one soap opera or call to your friend, who reassures you that your lump is nothing serious? Note your avoidance techniques in the winner’s book.

3. Who is your adviser during the time of failure? So you seek consolation around your family or abusive partner? Have you got someone really competent in the field that you are challenging? make a list who has helped you with the last problem and how effective was their advice.

4. Do you learn from your mistakes? Running in the rat race does not mean a blind following the leaders. have you burnt the roast last Sunday? What are you going to do the next time to avoid the same mistake? Who can you ask for advice or help?Note your ideas in the winner’s book.

5. Are your goals realistic? I have written many times about proper goal setting. But the rat race will often force you to take too much on your shoulders or to ignore the threats that are unique for you. You like doing exercises and visit the gym regularly. But suddenly you and had to go to hospital because of food poisoning, had a surgery and were on a diet. Will you start doing the same exercises straightaway after coming back home?

6. Do you take the reality into account? Your relationship with your family members is very tense. Your mother has just lost her husband, but borrowed some money from you before this sad event. Now you are under pressure because your old washing machine has broken and the new was needed. But your mother has to pay for funeral. She is in mourning and asking her for money would be the last advisable thing. What would you do?

Take Acton Now – think of your last failure and check it, using the criteria from today’s post. Note your ideas in the winner’s book and take the first step – now – to act more efficiently in the future.

Remember to share your discoveries  – just leave your comment and become the hero of my next posts. Thanks

Unfortunately you have forgotten about the trip and promised your parents to pick them up to the birthday party as they had no one to help them.

You might also stay for some minutes to give your aunt the present. There might be negative consequences in both cases. It is just the matter of more pain- for you and the other people involved. Now you are tossing  how to win the challenge.

Today you can contribute to this post. Kate, one of the Victorlander, is experiencing the same problem.  Write the end of the story and share your thoughts. I realize that you might have no idea and starting to write always the hardest part.

Here are some tips which you can use:

• What would you do, being in Kate’s shoes? Has it ever happened to you or your friends?
• What advice would you give Kate to learn from the lesson?
• What would be the most challenging dilemma in your case?

Take Action Now - Think of your present dilemma from Kate’s perspective. What can you do today to win the challenge? Take the first step NOW.

Get involved and leave a comment under this post. Thank you and have a nice day.

Good or bad decision? All depends on the point of view and the later events. But also… your next decisions. What was my score?

After arrival I met my friend who was waiting at the arrivals hall. We got into her car and went to the shopping centre. There were many cosy restaurants and cafe’s where we could chill out and  have lunch or coffee. The weather was fantastic, we had a nice chat. While leaving the restaurant I suddenly noticed a currency exchange opposite the shop. What a disappointment. I have lost a fortune on the exchange rate at the airport!

According to Anthony Robbins it’s better to “make any decision”. You never know, being 100% certain, that the better opportunity will arise and when the fate makes your “unfortunate” decision a blessing.

What would you think being in my shoes? It would be useless to come back at the airport just to lose even more money on another deal. Fortunately I still had some money for exchange and have made a much better deal in the shopping centre. That was the first good news.

Some days later I received  the “lost money” back. I found a nice surprise while borrowing a charger from the reception and checking if the taxi to the airport was booked. What happened? I had paid for too many nights and now I could receive some funds back. What a luck! The only sad thing was that… the next day I was going to the airport to take my return flight.

Take Action Now. Have you made an “unfortunate decision” lately? Take a different look at it today and find the blessings.

What would be your story? Share with your adventures here and crack an uplifting code in my next posts. leave your comment. Thanks.

Learn how to achieve really fulfiling goals. Let’s crack some most definintions of success.

1. Real success is the best reward for tough struggling with obstacles. Yes, finally you have proved yourself that the impossible is … possible. The toughest the challenge the biggher your satisfaction. Have you ever noticed the huge benefited from leaving a toxic person, even when the breakup was very discomfortable?  Check if all your relationships are really worth your trouble.

2. Real success motivates you to take more difficult challenges in  the future. Unbelievable? Start recording your victories regularly in the winner’s book, even the tinniest ones. Soonwill help you to take more ambitious challenges. Do you remember your first steps in learning cooking? Yes, it might be a siumple salad or jsut a sandwich. But later you became confident enough to cook a very sophisticated dinner for 20 people.

3. Real success makes you stronger. You are more familiar with more effective methods  to achieve your goal. Therefore  you acquire more wisdom and skills. Just one more lesson learnt.  The more challenging the goal, the more useful will be your victory. Leaving a toxic partner? How much might it cost you and how much better will you feel later? What will you know then and use to choose the better partner in teh future? But it’s enough. Let’s say that you both have an argument and this time you are no longer triggered by his aggressiveness, leaving him on his own with toxic emotions.

Take action now. Think of the biggest victory of your life. How does it motivate you today? What obstacles did you need to win to succeed? How did you win? What can you do to use this tool more often for your benefit now?

It IS easier than you might think. Learn the tips below and do your homework. That is enough just to change your life for ever and for good. There are only five tips, to follow to succeed.  Some of them might be obvious, but are  often neglected.

1. Commit and make decision – even if the job will be challenging, despite obstacles which will appear.Commitment itself is not enough. Even if you print a wall-size decleration nothing will happen without taking action. Some jobs might be boring or unnecessary in your opinion, but in a long run they will have positive effect on your life.

2. Find a big reson of changing yoru life. Otherwise your motivation and commitment will disappear with the first obstacle. Let’s say that you intend to stop smoking. Think why you want to live differently than today? What benefits in the future motivates you to make an effort?

3. Set realistic goals – Plan your process of changes. Tatke the challenge by doing small steps. Sometimes you will need to change the methods of pursuing your goals.If you are the beginner, skip the challenges reserved for professionals. Have you been abused? Work on your inner strength first. then you can change the reality around you.

4. Find a supporter who will uplift you at the times of doubt and resignation. You are often more critical to you tha other people might be and underestimate your potential. This tip is especially important for the victims of doemstic violence. Without professional help your changes may fail.

5. Record your achievements. You will be surprised how much you can change, reading your words after a month or a year. Writing even the smallest victories will show you how much you can achieve. Your list of personal victories will be useful at times of depression and disappointment.You will benefit even more for sharing your victories with your supporters

Take Action Now - Revise your goals for 2012. Which of them imply making changes? Find one example and evaluate the ods of success – according to today’s blog psot.

Have you ever heard the expression “Do not pray for easy lives. Pray to be stronger men”. John F. Kennedy. Now meet the ultimate thruth about easy or difficult life.

1. Easy job is relaxing and pleasant. That is obvious and the most tempting. procrastination is the way to avoid uncomfortable job. Moreover, you can also meet people who will promote living the life without making an effort. Just look at commercials and Tv programmes. have you seen a film where all the problems solved themselves, a happy end was always certain to happen?

2. Easy means making no effort. it is true in some cases. Learn properly a new skill  you don’t need to think how to do the job. Just think of driving a car or using a computer. But even if you can do a given job nothing happens if you don’t take action. The truth is that it is not easy to start sometimes, because…

3. Easy job is always comfortable when you have the right skills .  I mean the job that is very familiar to you But… You can drive a car as a professional yet driving is cumbersome. How about collecting your partner from the airport at 5am, travelling for three hours? You are driving in the haze, had to get up much earlier than usual. Last time you had an argument in the car while coming back. How eagerly will you take action then?

4. Easy is not always important. Sometimes it’s true. In most cases we tend to procrastinate difficult and unleasant (but also easy) jobs. On the other hand, an easy small step will encourege you to take harder challenges. Let’s take driving again. You don’t start learning on the motorway during your first classes. It would end by accident. This rule applies to all the types of learning, including happier life.

Some self-help guru suggest a shock therephy, doing the toughest tasks instantly, changing your life right now. i have mentioned in one of my posts that exahusting training program will harm you. Even if you achieve something it will effect you for a short time.

Take action now.  How many times are you mislead by the unreal world on TV? Can you ignore the vision of life which is not true in your case and harmful for yourself? Take the first step.

Be involved and share your views. Leave your comment. Thank you

However, there are some simple tips which will help you to make more accurate choices.

Someone said “To succeed you need to be the right person, with right skills, at the right place and at the right time “. How to apply this rule while following the other people’s advice? Let’s look at the quote more thoroughly

It’s not the right time. You might be busy, stressed and exhausted after a long day at work. The job is more and more stressful and you have little rest. Your parents suggest that a new job would solve the problem. You might follow their advice. However you fail on the interview. Luckily you haven’t dumped the old job – which is still disempowering.

You might work on self-discipline, commitment, but nothing will be achieved if your mind is exhausted and you just cannot think properly. let’s say that you make miestakes on your CV or cannot answet the questions during the interview.

Your advisers are not the right people for you . I mean inappriopriate in terms of communication or having no respect in your eyes.In this case you can define who deserves your respect. Yet if the adviser uses manipulative tricks you may not be vigilant enough to make a good decision. Think of your wealth. You can see many seudo experts on investments on TV. They usually give advice appropriate to some circles’ business, but not for your own benefit.

You are not the right pesron. You will not follow the avdice  lacking the required competences. Thinking of investments you need to know financial jargon and the basic terms. Otherwise you don’t understand the plot of discussion and you are easily mislead. Your pension scheme advisor will talk to you differently than to his collegues having similar experiece as him. Moreover, you will not be able to ask the questions which will help you to make a good choice.
Your advisor uses negative communication. Even a good advice will not work while used during nagetive criticism. The other reason is pointing out obstacles and unpleasent outcome. Let’s say that you are sensitive to your earnings. Your spouse suggests you to change your job because you cannot be promoted and make more money. She nags you, pointing out your pitfalls and weak points, without positive feedback
Your  adviser will not follow the rules . Think of your parents or spouse. You love them, but their words are not congruent with deeds. Let’s say that your mother suggests you to marry, but herself had some boyfriends and was living together. At present she might nag you on being agrumentative while doing the same herself.

Take Action Now. Where are you at the moment? Do your advisers match your needs? Share your view.

Become involved and leave your comment, thank you.

 Self-confidence

1. You need to make huge effort to act as self-confident person. In this case your bahavior is not natural. Putting a mask works short-term only. For example, being hurt and not showing your anger. Earlier or later your negative emotions will explode in uncontrolled way. Just think of your recent argument, when you broke out because of earlier interaction.

It is easier to put a mask outside your home. Unfortunately, the colser the relationship the more difficult is to pretend a different person than your family knows – just because they know you from inside.

2. Your self-confidence vanishes when you challenge your fears. You might be strong until someone will trigger your insecurities. The same person will be dangerous since you realize they can use your weaknesses on their favour. This threat is dangerous in family interactions when the past deeds done for you or stressful experiences may be used to manipulate you. Let’s say that you were struggling with education and later your family refers to your “stupidity”.

3. You are aggressive and prone to use violence. Very often, false self-confidence masks insecurity. You might be bossy or dominative. In this way you hope to be seen as a strong person and to gain the other’s respect because of your power. But the truth is that dominance and aggression never works in the long run. You will meet many people who are fooled by your behavior. However earlier or later you will meet some real self-confident people, ignoring all your ways to dominate them.

Being aggressive leads to conflict where you will need to defend and your false self-confidence will be at risk.

Take Action Now. Check if your self-confidence is genuine. How will you talk to your parents during an agrument?

Become involved and leave your comment, thank you.

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While talking about taking risk, you might have one thought in your  mind: “Are there any levels of challenge?  How to define them to achieve my goals?

I will try to give you some tips  – how to crack the code of challenge. Let’s start from real example.

Kate is going to change her life and unleash  her inner potential . However she is facing some tough obstacles. Coming from abusive family, she is not very assertive. Starting her business forces her to challenge her weakness.

At presnt she is confident about her situation. SWhile receiving her grant as a start-up there is no big pressure of making money to survive.Kate does need to try beating competition. Instead there are more custoemrs buying more than some months ago. Her business becomes recognized and recommended. She can avoid her challenges like desperate asking for help or the necessity to negotiate. At this stage of business growth she can cope with all the tasks herself – bookeeping or marketing.

However Kate’s business started to grow fster and she needs more capital as her grant could not cover the rocketing investments. There are also new competitors on the market so more intensive promotion is needed. The grant will be unavailable soon and is due to repayment.  Kate realizes that she will need to visit her bank manager and apply for a loan.

Negotiation skills are essential, but Kate can easily be forced to accept unfavourable terms imposed by the bank. She was always struggling while defining her own demands or presenting her own proposal. But it is “be or not to be” situation. To expand her business Kate needs to take risk.

What are her choices?

1. Small steps with help of the others. Winning the challenge gradyally. She will handle a minor discomfort, asking her trusted advisors for help. and risking rejection. Now meeting with the bank manager will be easier as Kate can act the situation and learn useful tips how to succeed.

2. Challenging the problem on her own. Trusting her own skills and preparing for the meeting herself, accodring to her own experience. It will take her more time to prepare all the documents or answers to potential wuestions. Kate is taking risk, but also has an opportunity to gain all the merits.

3. Trusting her intuition and good luck without preparation. Kate has not done her homework and goes to see the bank manager straight away. She will find the answer for the questions that may be asked. Her strong belief in success and inner power will atract positive feedback, friendly attitude and eventually – favourable terms in the contract.

Take Action Now. Evaluate your own, the most current challenge. Are you going to ask for help or act on your own? Why have you chosen this option and how will you benefit from it?

Which attitude is the best? Stay tunned with my blog and you will soon find the answer.

Are you really involved? Leave your comment here. Thank you.

Most of us associate Easter with bunnies, lambs and eggs. You probably also know many metaphors, e.g. “to egg sbo on sth”. But probably you have never wondered how eggs can help you to be successful and happy. Here is the secret

Now meet the 5 codes for you today. The list is probably longer and we might crack them later. So what is an egg about?

1. Comfort zone. Just imgine you during the pregnancy. No need to fight for food, your mom is pfotecting you, she has to be careful, resign from drinking, weight lifting… You are just enjoying the time in the womb. The same is with chicken before hatch.

In your real life you might find your job. Apart from your duties and coming on time, nothing else bothers you. taxes, investments, bookkiping… Yes, you pay taxes, but you don’t need to calculate them or check the latest legal regulations.

But there is one danger – the egg might be broken. The employer can be unable to protect you longer, like the hen hurt by a fox. Your food inside the egg is running out and you start starving. So what can you do then?
2. Breaking limits. Your birth was your first challenge. somhow stimulated by your mother’s mechanism. But you also started to accumulate excertion which has to be released outside the womb.

Your job might be a perfect womb, but inevitably you will need to leave it while retiring or downsized. Breaking your crust involves taking an effort. It is a hard work, might be stressful and bring much discomfort. You might procrastinate your decision t start because
3. Your new life is unknown. But now take it in a different way. have you ever heard of ” egg surprise”? If not ask kids. Chocolate, sweets. Seems nice. But in the real world surprises are not pleasant. You coud associate the egg with a bomb or a mine. But you never learn the truth until you crack the crust. Your friends may tell you that the egg is dangerous while the truth is different. It is you who decies who is right
4. New opportunity. Both leaving an egg and cracking the unknown one mean that. leaving disempowering job will help you to work better, revives your professional power. At the same time you are cracking another egg – of new challenges – learning new skills, seeking new job. Now you can discover your…
5 New potential. Eggs are seeds of new life. All the opportunities are hidden in the places, people or challenges which are not explored yet. like a plant’s seed, an egg is a new opportunity. it needs to be treated with care, like the wealth invested on the financial market.

Take Action Now - What is your Easter egg today, the potential of success? Become involved and leave your comment, thank you.